Gold Tinsel! I Got Gold Tinsel!

I think I got the Christmas spirit because I had to buy this Christmas tree today. There is a little tree lot at the end of my block, so I just went ahead and got this lil' adorable 4 footer. Just in time before the snowstorm...

And the Topper...

Best $13 I ever wasted...
I saw this tree topper at the store and I could not stop laughing...
It's totally tackily awesome and beautiful!

No Pilot Light, But at Least I'm Not Dead

The work is being done in my basement to decentralize the gas utilities. Yesterday, the gas was turned off and when it was turned back on, the workers didn't relight the pilot light. I woke this morning to the delicious smell of gas permeating my kitchen. Whoops. It was supposed to be taken care of today. Maybe someday, I'll have lower gas bills and a non-toxic apartment.

Most Environmental Activity of Late: I Darned My Socks

I am kind of particular about the socks I wear, and I have had a consistent problem when my favorite socks wear down: the big toe area gets a hole in it before the rest of the sock wears out.

For shame, I threw some of these toe-hole socks away because my toe would start to stick out and get cold. As I threw them away, I thought: "what a waste." And I would also wonder, "why doesn't anyone darn socks? what does it mean to darn socks? is that from a Charles Dickens novel or what?"

A quick internet search turned up:
mend: sewing that repairs a worn or torn hole (especially in a garment)

But typical of definitions, it doesn't tell you how to do it. In my mind, darning socks actually involved knitting or crocheting tiny threads to actually weave a new fabric over the area of the hole. Who has time for that?

Then I realized, "there's no darning police. there's no one here who will say my darning method is wrong." So, I just sewed up the hole by stitching one side to the other side. And you know what? It looks fine. And technically, I darned it.

My new ability to darn my toe-holes has saved several pairs of socks from the trash barrel, and has made me feel like my personal policies are more environmentally sustainable since my socks now last a little longer.

Making Friends on the CTA

I had to take a CTA bus to meet up with my Thanksgiving ride on Wednesday of last week. I met some really nice and outgoing people on the bus.

As you know from this blog, I love to eavesdrop in public places. The public conversation on the bus was a good one. I was sitting near the back of the bus and kind of listening to these two guys talking about the high corruption at the Salvation Army. Apparently, they just spent a bunch of money buying mansions for their executives in the suburbs. According to the bus passenger, the execs, and even the employee of the month, drive extremely fancy cars like Hummers, Bentleys, etc. Haven't you seen all those fancy cars in the parking lots? Etc. This guy really had a flair for the dramatic and it was great!

During this conversation, I was sitting in my bus seat, and there was a handsome young guy at the bus door, well-dressed and well-coiffed, who was apprently giving me the eye. When he got off the bus, Mr. Salvation Army was going on and on about how the guy was oogling me and how he should have just said 'hi' instead of staring and how I probably thought he was a sexual predator since he was staring so much but how he might of had a chance if he just said 'hi', etc. etc. He got so extreme with the conversation until I finally had to turn around and acknowledge the discussion.

"Yeah," I said, "he was a cutie. He should have said hi."

This illicited laughter and an enthusiastic, "See! She said he was a cutie! He could have had a chance! Guys don't know how to say 'hi' anymore. Times have changed where sometimes the woman can speak first but some guys don't like it and think the woman is fast, etc. etc."

Another guy on the bus who was sitting with his girlfriend said, "Well, she hollared at me first," and gave his girlfriend a big kiss on the lips.

The conversation went on from there, and Mr. SA and his friends were teasing me about my big suitcase for my short trip and all kinds of other stuff. But it was a friendly and fun exchange that started a great holiday weekend.

But Seriously, A Real Reason to Give Thanks: Lower Gas Bills

Over the past 4 months, I've been in a stressful disagreement with my landlord over the utility set-up in my apartment building. Luckily, it is almost resolved, with an actual end to the problem finally in sight on November 29.

Last year, with the super-spike in gas prices after Hurricane Katrina, my gas bills were between $150-190 during the winter months. The insanely high prices tipped me off that something was wrong with my utility set up, and I received confirmation of this after checking with my downstairs neighbors. (They live in a similar sized apartment, bigger actually, and their bills maxed out at $100/month at the worst.)

While trying to figure out what was happening, I talked to my landlord about it. He denied that there was any problem, blamed me (do you cook a lot? take a lot of showers?), but eventually agreed to give me a small credit of a 25% discount on one month last year. As my utility bills stayed sky-high, I called many non-profit agencies around town that claimed to be energy experts - no one could help. The gas company wouldn't help me either. I was at loose ends and discovered that the dryer to the building was hooked onto my gas utility line. I couldn't find any hard numbers to find out what this was costing me, but my landlord offered to give me "half the quarters" from the coin-op laundry that I was paying the utilities for. I was outraged.

I found out that my summer gas bills, about $50-60/month far exceeded my downstairs neighbors, who were paying $10/month. Because I felt so outraged, and because I felt like my landlord was [not a very nice person], I was planning to move out of the apartment this summer. However, since I liked the actual apartment so much, I told the landlord I would stay in the apartment if only the utilities were metered separately in the basement. I wasn't asking for special treatment, just to pay my fair share instead of paying for a lot of extra people to use the dryer and god knows what else. Various other situations made it difficult for me to move, and the landlord ended up agreeing to meter the utilities separately. He said he would do this during the month of September.

September came and went. So did October. At the end of October, I was feeling furious and betrayed. I sent several letters requesting the work to be done and also for some additional winterizing in my apartment. After I sent a certified letter with my November rent, I finally saw some work happening around the house. The good news is, I ran into my landlord last night, and he mentioned that all the work has been done to rewire the utilities, and that the meter will be installed on November 29. Three months late, but I am so relieved and happy that it is finally happening. This was a mental stressor to me for months and months, and I'm so glad to see a resolution.

It's Thanksgiving; time to give thanks for small favors.

Sometimes I feel despondent about not being all snuggly in a couple (see previous post.)

However, yesterday I realized that things could be worse.

At the gym, there was a young woman a few elllipticals machines away from me. She was obviously there with her fella - a guy who was jogging, but mostly walking around the track. Each time he came around the track (maybe 15 times) he would clap and say rather loudly, "Doing good, hon! You're doing great!" (Clap! Clap!)

How obnoxious! And how patronizing. I mean, she's working out on a machine for 20 minutes, not giving birth! Does she really need that much encouragement? I was embarrassed on her behalf.

How to Break Up With Your Man - Holiday Edition

It's Thanksgiving week, which means the depressing holidays are here. I'm not saying that all holidays are depressing, but some of the obligatory social events can be rather unpalatable, especially as a single woman of a certain age. I was talking with some guy friends at lunch about it today - one married, two in LTRs - and complaining about our work Christmas party.

The place where I work is small - maybe 10 people - and all but 2 are married. In past years, we had a jolly lunch with our colleagues, and then cut out early in the afternoon. This year, a coworker is hosting a Christmas dinner party on Friday night at his/her home. There are several things wrong with this scenario:

1) it does not occur during work hours
2) it implies a much longer time obligation
3) significant others/spouses are invited*

"Well, surely you can bring a guest?" my friends inquired.

I could bring a guest. But, let's face it, is there a faster road to getting dumped than to take a fledging love interest to a work Christmas party? "Hi, everyone. This is Frank. We met online last week on Match.com? He likes traveling, and dog-racing. I think we're meant to be!" Attendance at the office Christmas party definitely requires some kind of pre-determined loyalty, and also probably an agreement of reciprocity that you must attend the other person's Christmas party too. And, you probably owe the person a phat-ass Christmas gift.

For this year's party, I'm considering following in the footsteps of Borat, and perhaps inviting a male escort as my guest. "Hey, ya'll, this is my guy Tito. Oh, you haven't heard me talk about him. Um, isn't he hot and muscular?" At least that would keep it interesting.

*Although, I think the party would actually be better if all the spouses attended. I really like all of my coworkers' spouses. It's purely for selfish reasons of not being part of a couple.

The Blog Crossroads

I've been remiss to put anything of substance on my blog for quite a while now. You know why? Because I think it would probably be a case of TMI. I've been so emotional for the past few months that anyone around me, and probably the only people that check this blog, hear enough about it. You know? I mean, you know who you are, people! (Oh, and thanks for being there for me! Love ya!)

But, do I want to write anything about the new James Bond movie that I saw last weekend? Or the crappy "gotcha" scene in Sucker Bet where some dude puts an alligator in some other dude's car and jumps out when dude's holding a raw steak?! No.

I think I'm at the proverbial Blogger crossroads (1 year later) where I feel like I need to reimagine my blog. Or end it.

"Sucker Bet" update.

Man, this book is corny!

There was a scene when the some crooks try to scare off a detective by putting an alligator in his trunk an a raw steak in the passenger seat. The alligator busts through the back seat to get the steak, and the 60-year old Italian detective uses a judo move to stun the alligator. Uh-huh.

Cold Weather Reading

It's that time of year where the weather gets cold and people retreat indoors. In my view, it is the perfect time to read detective novels and sci-fi novels, both silly and noir. Today I picked up "Sucker Bet" from the library. Whoo-hoo! It starts out in a casino with a "mark" that is being lured to a blackjack table by a red-headed prostitute named "Candy Hart." Ha!

Also, I picked up Percival Everett's "Zulus." This is the line in the cover text that got me,

"Zulus is set amidst the eerie landscape and society that has emerged years after the occurrence of a thermonuclear war, where Alice Achitophel, a 300-pound governement clerk and misfit, has a well-kept secret: she is, perhaps, the last woman alive who is not sterile." Hee!

It's Like Santa Visited Congress

Waking up this morning to the good news of a victory for the Democratic party was like waking up on Christmas Day as a child, and seeing a really awesome toy... that everyone voted for... hmm.

Good Things In Life #33

When I leave for work about 20 minutes earlier than my usual time, I happen upon the sweetest thing. I walk by an elementary school on the way to the train when people are still arriving in the morning. The student crossing guards are still out at the street corners. They must have a policy of helping everyone cross the street. Because when I start to walk across the street, this 5th grader in a fluorescent yellow vest and holding a stop sign, crosses the street with me and officially holds up traffic.

This is so freakin' adorable that I can barely stand it.

I always say "thank you," and I can tell by the kid's response that 1) he isn't used to be thanked, and 2) the situation of helping an adult cross the street garners an awkward! moment. It's hilarious!