Thunderhawk

Recently, I was out at a bar. I introduced myself to a tall, cute, bearded guy wearing a blue t-shirt, black sport coat, and those black indie-style glasses. He introduced himself as "Bart", or as his new *real* name "Thunderhawk."

"Thunderhorse?" I asked.

"No!" he exclaimed, "that's an insult in my culture. Thunderhawk. I got a message from God when I came out of the bathroom, and he said that I should be named Thunderhawk."

Now, as written above, I assume that this conversation has already delivered a red flag to the reader. You may be thinking, "Obviously, this Thunderhawk is absolutely bonkers." But, you see, this line of conversation was delivered in very cute, very tall, very dimpled packaging. Here are the reasons I gave this guy 5 more minutes of my time:

1) You really never know who you might meet, and what their background is.

2) I'm not locationally prejudiced enough to think that a spiritual message must absolutely be delivered in a traditionally spiritual place.

3) Who would say that as a joke?

So I tried to talk to Thunderhawk some more about his name, and about other spiritual matters. But eventually I realized he was just another white hipster attempting to be ironic or something.

And thus, "Thunderhawk" and his friend "Fluffy Pillow Hawk" walked into the night.

P.S. I am NOT "Fluffy Pillow Hawk."