Mirror, Mirror Mistletoe

It's weird what you see reflected back from your family members to yourself over the holidays.

My dad and I were talking about grudges. He told me about a work colleague that he has had a grudge against for over 30 years.
I said, "I knew I got it from somewhere."
He said, "You're a chip off the old block. Don't kid yourself."

Marta's Beadations - Here for the X-mas Season

One of my beadations...

Santa Hats = Fashion No-No

Yesterday I saw two people walking around sportin' Santa hats, and they were not wearing Santa suits.

When I was but a twinkle in my parents' eye, my dad would say to me:



"You lose 90% of your body heat out of your head."

Since I heard those words of wisdom, I been very pro snow hat. Why not? It keeps your head warm.

However, I just can't support the wearing of Santa hats for the purpose of headwarming during the holidays. I realize that the purpose is probably two-fold: both festive and warm. But, I think the cutting edge fashion critics of People magazine, and her highness Tyra Banks herself, would agree that Santa hats without a matching Santa suits are better left to the office Christmas party.

Things I've learned from the P&P Project

• I found two people in my life who are obsessed with the Pride and Prejudice story, have seen every movie version (including a 300 hour version), and apparently played a board game!?!?

I repeat: Two people have this in common.

In the time of Pride and Predjudice?

I started a new personal project this week. The project still needs a name, but it has a goal. I want to know and read one of each of my friends' most favorite books.

My first phase is Margaret's book, Pride and Predjudice. Normally, I don't care for "period" books, but I decided to follow my own project rules and give it a try. So far, I'm on page 73 and I find the book to be facinating. I love the subtle dialogue that expresses and exposes social norms and desires. The characters all have so many social rules that they must follow.

At one dance, Elizabeth gets snubbed by Mr. Darcy (and everyone knows it.) At a later dance, she refuses to dance with him. She has a rep to protect! In the world of P&P, a guy couldn't ask a girl to dance, even if they've been to several of the same occasions, unless someone else intimate with both parties introduced them.

"What a bore!" I thought, "I'm so glad we don't have to follow social rules like that today!"

Until I went out to a swing dance club last night.

When I got roped into dancing with a robot named Mork, who danced embarrassingly slow to a mambo beat and couldn't give me a twirl if his life depended on it, when an acquainted man-friend left my friend and I as wilting wall flowers for 100 songs even though he is a great dancer, I was thinking about Pride and Predjudice.

How would these events at the swing dance be seen through the lens of P&P?
Probably, I would have know all about robo-mork and been able to turn him down for a dance to spare myself the awkwardness.

And the man friend? The social slight would not have gone unnoticed. All the society ladies would be talking about what a bad countenance and temperament and manners he had. Well, they would say that to me and my friend until we left the room.

Then, when talking to him, those bitches would talk about my friend and I in the same way.

Ginger Citrus Spritzer

Here's a great recipe for a festive holiday drink:

Boil 1 cup water, 1 cup sugar, and 1 cup sliced ginger for 15 minutes.
Let cool.

Stir in 1/2 cup freshly squeezed orange juice and 1/2 cup freshly squeezed lemon juice.
Add club soda to taste.

No Hamburgers, But United Against Gas Prices

I bridged the gap with my neighbors last night re: our collective gas bills. It seems that the local gas co is jacking up prices, but also that the furnaces at our place are working at a less-than-stellar rate. For the sake of my budget, I need to investigate the situation as my bill reflected the use of 111 therms for the month of November. WTF?!? Am I heating the entire building here???

My plan of attack:
1. make sure the correct meter is hooked up to my unit.
2. check the efficiency of the radiators.
3. check the efficiency of the furnance.
4. check the efficiency of the gas dryer, which is hooked on to MY gas line for at least three people.
5. install plastic on windows.

The Shuffler

I got on the brown line today, and my weirdo-meter was pinging slightly.

I spotted a guy on the platform who had two concern-causing indicators.
#1: Tinted glasses, the number one appearance indicator that warrants suspicion.
#2: An intense stare at everyone who was coming up the stairs to the platform, like he's just waiting to catch someone's eye to strike up a conversation.

Anyway, we all got on the train and settled in for our 45 minute ride downtown.
I sat kitty-corner from this guy, who I noticed took off his gloves and was shuffling a deck of cards. He was the kind of shuffler who doesn't just split the deck into two piles and flip them together. But he splits the deck into all kinds of little parts and combines them in complicated shuffling ways. In other words, a pro.

But also, weird.
It's 10 degrees outside, the brown line is dead quiet with everyone either reading or listening to their earphones, and dude took off his gloves to shuffle cards at 9 a.m.

He kept this up for the entire 45 minute train ride. Not only that, but he was giving everyone an intense vegas stare as if to challenge people to come up to his imaginary blackjack table.

Shuffle, shuffle, shuffle.
Five of spades.
Shuffle, shuffle, shuffle.
Five of hearts.
Shuffle, shuffle, shuffle.
Five of clubs.
Shuffle, shuffle, shuffle.
Five of diamonds.

Cards back in the deck, and repeat.